THE LOGICAL ENDING TO DIRTY DANCING

THE LOGICAL ENDING TO...

DIRTY DANCING!

We are near the end at the scene where Baby and her family are sitting at the Kellerman closing banquet. She is sitting there either pouting like a little dog...or cringing while listening to the most grotesque attempt at singing as the committee is singing about "joining hands and hearts and voices" (you all remember that song - it was TERRIBLE!) But wait! At the back door, enter Johnny (with obligatory bad ass leather jacket). He greets his friends at the entrance and then does a creepy Terminator scan for Baby. Seriously, watch that scene again, it looks like a scene right out of The Terminator...the leather jacket doesn't help either.
Johnny then approaches the Houseman table. Baby, who I think may have wet herself (or worse) seeing him, smiles widely. What follows is the line that EVERYONE remembers to this day!

Johnny: "Nobody puts Baby in the corner!"

Then beckons her like a dog to follow him. The father (the late great Jerry Orbach) stands up to protest, but apparently his wife's powerful grip is enough to subdue an angry father.
A beeline is made to the stage. Johnny and Baby walk up the stage (thankfully shutting up that sad excuse for a chorus line), and he makes his big speech:

Johnny: "Sorry for the disruption folks. But I always do the last dance of the season." (I think he is going to cry...unfortunately he doesn't) "But this year somebody told me not to. So I'm going to do my kind of dancing with a great partner. Who's not only a great dancer, but somebody's who's taught me that there are people willing to stand up for other people, no matter what it costs them. Somebody who's taught me about the kind of person I want to be. Miss Francis Houseman."

Now this would normally be the part where Mr. Houseman goes to get up again, and Mrs. Houseman stops him with the line "Sit down Jake." and every girl in the universe lets out a little scream.

BUT, since I am the one re-writing here, this is where I cut in:

Mr. Housman gets up, and yells out: "She is only 16!! I know what you've been doing with her! I call statutory rape!"

The crowd's murmur gets louder. Just then one of the guests stand up and flashes a NY Catskills County Sheriff's Badge. "Is this true, Ms. Houseman?"

Baby (in tears) shamefully nods her head. The sheriff walks up the stage and places handcuffs on the great Johnny Castle. A protest begins with some of his fellow dancers. Security is able to subdue them while Johnny is taken away to the sheriff's car that was parked outside.

Baby looks over to her father. "I hate you! I never want to talk to you again!" She storms off the stage and goes outside. Her sister Lisa takes off after her. She finally catches up to Baby.

Lisa: "Listen Baby, I know you loved him. But this was just a summer fling."

Baby: "But I'll never forget him. There will never be another man like him."

Lisa: "And I hope not. Seriously, all he wanted to do was dance! What about watching a movie or going to dinner? You need to let him go. I mean seriously - did you even know his middle name?"

Baby buries her face in her sisters outstretched arms.

The screen fades to black. Text appears on the screen and reads as follows:

"John Edward Castle was indicted on 1 count of sex with a minor on Septemer 3, 1963. Upon further checking, he was charged with 7 more counts of sex with a minor, as it was found that every year prior he intentionally victimized one family by seducing their youngest daughter. In his second year, the girl was only 12 years old! He has been placed in a federal facility for an undisclosed sentence. Police continue to investigate more allegations as they arrive."



NOW THAT'S AN ENDING!

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RIP Patrick Swayze. While I never liked you as an actor, I am not trying to defame you on a personal level.